Only You (A Sweet Torment Novel) Read online

  Also in Joya Ryan’s Sweet Torment Series

  Breathe You In

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, organizations, places, events, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

  Text copyright © 2014 Joya Ryan

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.

  Published by Montlake Romance, Seattle

  www.apub.com

  Amazon, the Amazon logo, and Montlake Romance are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc., or its affiliates.

  ISBN-13: 9781477824375

  ISBN-10: 1477824375

  Cover design by Georgia Morrissey

  Library of Congress Control Number: 2014903121

  To Roc

  Thank you for your constant love, support, and much needed reality checks. You always seem to know what to say and you rock with all those details I know nothing about.

  Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  Chapter One

  Thanks for manning the desk, Paige,” Jean Posy said, and took her glasses off, letting them hang to her neck. “Want me to bring you back anything?”

  Jean was the personal assistant to the governor of New York and the closest thing to a mother figure I had. My mother was back in Indiana and only spoke to me when she felt like preaching or digging up old dirt to throw in my direction. She was also manning the trailer I grew up in and still married to the prick who nearly ruined my life ten years ago.

  “No thanks, I’ve got a protein shake.” Plus I had a lot of work to get done over the lunch break and since everyone would be out, it’d be a quiet place to do so. Glancing out the window, I tried to not let the nice spring day sway my decision.

  “Okay, then. I’ll see you in a bit.” Jean’s gaze lingered and I saw unease and pity on her face. Yeah. She knew. Everyone around here knew. And by tomorrow, the press would make sure the entire country knew.

  My boss, Bill Vorse, Chief Communications Officer to the governor, was involved in a sex scandal.

  He was also kind of a douche. I had been on the receiving end of his unwanted advances a time or two over the past year I’d been his assistant. Looked like he finally went too far, and rumor around the office was that it wasn’t with just one girl. And there were pictures. The story would break tomorrow.

  When it did, would I still have a job?

  I rubbed my temple, trying to ward off the coming migraine, and sat behind Jean’s desk. If Bill got fired—which he likely would—most of his staff would be let go as well to make room for the governor’s new Chief Communications Officer. Though Governor Reese was madly in love and living with my best friend, I’d never ask for any favors. But damn it, I wanted my job.

  It took me several years, three internships, one degree, and a crap ton of student loans to land this job. The last two years of hard work I put in at the governor’s office to build a respectable career and better life for myself would not be flushed because of Bill’s wandering-dick syndrome.

  Letting out a long sigh, I looked at my protein shake sweating on Jean’s desk, then at the bowl of candy.

  Protein shake?

  Candy?

  Eff the shake.

  I reached for the dish to take a handful of Hershey’s Kisses, and as if the bowl shot me the middle finger, I knocked it over and onto the floor.

  “Damn it.”

  Walking around to the front of the desk and dropping to my hands and knees, I started collecting the chocolates and putting them back in the bowl. Thank God no one was around or else I’d have to be a bit more demure. With my ass in the air, I reached to get the last chocolate wedged between the wall and desk.

  “Is there a good place I can stick this?” a deep, husky voice said from behind me.

  Directly behind me.

  I shot up, my head barely missing the edge of the desk, and ambled to my feet.

  “Excuse me?” I said, shuffling a bit unsteadily in my heels. I tugged the hem of my skirt down, swiped the few strands of hair that came loose from my bun out of my face, and prepared to address the man—

  Only my words dried up, which was the exact opposite of what was happening to my mouth . . . and panties.

  Tall, dark, and handsome was an understatement. He wore a pair of worn jeans and a white T-shirt that hugged bulging biceps and obviously chiseled abs. The cotton looked to be just slightly sweaty, but he smelled like cologne and spice and man. He held a small brown box for delivery and I had never been more caught off guard by a package in all my life.

  His jet-black hair was thick, though a ball cap covered it. Across it read “Savas Shipping.” A tribal-looking tattoo peeked out from the left side of his T-shirt sleeve, and when those intense blue eyes locked on my face, a flash of heat radiated through my whole body. But when his gaze traveled lower and landed on my breasts, I completely melted. And forgot how to breathe.

  “You alright, Red?”

  My eyes snapped to his, and I realized I had just been staring down his package. He unleashed a confident grin.

  “You’re breathing a little hard there.”

  “I, ah . . .” I shook my head, trying to gain my composure. This man walked in, caught me off guard, and was now flashing that stupid smile, and I was in no mood. “Is there something I can help you with?” I said sternly.

  As if unaffected by my “serious” voice, he openly scanned my entire body, and licked his lower lip. Making me suddenly have the urge to do the same.

  “Yeah.”

  He just stared, blue eyes blazing. Not saying anything else.

  “Ah, okay.” I tried again. “What is it?”

  “This.” He held up the small box. “I’m going to give it to Roman Reese.”

  “I don’t think so,” I said. No one came in here and informed a member of the governor’s staff what they were going to do. Roman was just reelected and with a scandal involving his staff on the horizon, he wasn’t taking interviews, much less random visitors.

  “We don’t let the delivery boys actually drop items off to public officials. You can leave it with me.”

  He balanced the box between his hip and forearm, raised a single brow, and shot the sexiest expression I’d ever seen. “Delivery boy, huh?”

  I tried sizing him up right back. Showing him that he didn’t affect me and that I meant business. But that was a mistake. Mostly because it made me drool a little, a problem I had just gotten under control.

  I knew his type. Man did I know his type. Way too good-looking for his own good—and he obviously knew it. He was cocky, tattooed, and ten to one odds were he owned a motorcycle. Likely his biggest goal
was making it to a Saturday keg party. He was the exact kind of guy I would never go for again. The kind of guy I’d been screwed over by. The kind I left back in Indiana right along with my past.

  I knew a long time ago if I wanted to live outside the trailer I grew up in, I had to start dressing, acting, and living for the life I wanted, not the life I had.

  And that life entailed upstanding gentlemen in suits who had ambition.

  “Well, I don’t think the governor would mind if I just pop in.”

  I stepped in front of him. “He’s not in. And I mind.”

  “What’s your name?” he asked with a little tilt of his chin that signified he thought my protest was cute at best. If there was something I understood, it was silent mockery.

  “You can call me Miss Levine.”

  “Oh I can, huh?”

  I lifted my chin a little and crossed my arms. He only seemed more amused.

  “I’m Leo,” he offered in a sugary tone. It was the kind of voice a man used when he was preparing to butter up a woman. Too bad I had been on the losing end of men in my life, which was why I steered clear of them. Most men could read women, and I apparently always flashed the wrong sign and attracted the wrong ones. I wasn’t a teenager looking for a guy with a fast car to save me from my life anymore. I also wasn’t the teenager left crying when that life—and that guy—turned out to be shitty.

  “That’s nice.”

  He took a step toward me, his gaze dropping to do that body scan thing again, leaving tingles over my skin. “I think we got off on the wrong foot here, Miss Levine.” Never taking his eyes from mine, he knelt down and picked up the candy dish. “Roman is expecting this,” he patted the box in his other hand, “and me.”

  “He’s not in,” I said again.

  “I’m a bit early.” He shrugged. “But I can wait. Maybe you’d be willing to entertain me?”

  My jaw dropped and my forehead hurt from how hard I was scowling at him.

  “I’m not here to entertain anyone. Especially—”

  “A delivery boy like me?” he said, clearly not appreciating what I had called him earlier.

  I glanced at my feet. “I didn’t mean to insult you,” I said, knowing how your station in society or job could be terms for people to judge you. Which was exactly what I was doing to him. I just needed to get out of this conversation and away from this man. Everything about him and his presence was a bad idea and I didn’t have the gumption to deal with it. Or the hot flush he brought out over my skin.

  “Just leave it here, and I’ll make sure the governor gets it.” There was no telling when Roman would be back in considering the last I heard, he had a private meeting he was taking off the books.

  “Alright, Miss Levine.” Leo set the box on Jean’s desk. “I apologize as well.” He leaned in a little. “You know, I’d be willing to entertain you.”

  I swallowed hard and my scalp pricked with excitement because there was something very serious behind his eyes. This man knew how to handle a woman.

  “That won’t be necessary,” I said, hoping my words didn’t sound as shaky as they felt.

  He nodded. “Okay then. How about a kiss for all my trouble of coming in here only for you to send me away?”

  My mouth dropped. This guy and his ego needed a big check. “You’ve got to be kidding me? I’ve heard better lines from a—”

  He handed me the candy dish, effectively cutting me off, and took a Hershey’s Kiss from the bowl.

  “Oh . . .” My face flared hot and I didn’t need to see it to know how mortified I must have looked. I put the candy dish on the desk and walked around to sit down behind it. Partly because my legs were a bit shaky and also because the closer this guy got to me, the more I could smell him. Hot and delicious. It made me realize just how long it had been since I’d had a man.

  Stupid body.

  Stupid day.

  “You look stressed, Miss Levine.” He crossed his arms, leaned a hip against the edge of the desk, and looked down at me.

  “I’m fine.” I kept my eyes fused to the computer screen, pretending I was not thinking about how close he was. “If there’s nothing else, you can see yourself out.”

  “You’re really trying to get rid of me.” He scooted an inch closer. This guy didn’t seem to understand boundaries or the fact that I wasn’t interested in flirting. Okay, I was interested, but that didn’t mean anything.

  “I have a lot of work to do and I’m confused as to why you’re still here. You made your delivery.”

  “Wow,” he said. “You’re kind of sexy when you’re irritated, Red.”

  I looked up at him and he winked, and I immediately went back to studying the computer. My defenses weren’t top notch against charm like his.

  “Come on.” He smiled. “You have to admit that line was better than the kiss one.”

  A tiny laugh escaped and my shoulders relaxed a little. It was just enough to let go of some of the tension I’d been carrying. Who was this guy? Whoever he was, he had balls to just hang around outside the governor’s office like he owned the place. He was also charismatic as hell and I wanted some of that easiness in my life.

  No. Scratch that. I wanted the life I had built. The life I had worked hard for. The life that proved I was better than where I’d come from. The life he was currently distracting me from.

  “What are you doing tonight?” he asked.

  Never taking my attention from my typing hands, I said, “Working.”

  He nodded. “Well, maybe when you’re done, I can take you to this great pub right down the street. Best hoagies in town.”

  “You want to buy me a sandwich?” Great. Just great. Last night I was stood up by an accountant I had seen a few times before. He made it obvious that his life was more glamorous than mine.

  “Yeah. I want to buy you a sandwich,” Leo said with a wide smile.

  I wanted to scoff, but those dimples caught my eye again and he shifted just enough for me to catch a peek of the black leather belt lining his hips, and he had me thinking twice. I never had a daddy complex . . . I had a John Stamos complex, Full House edition. And this guy, with his oozing swagger and way-too-sexy sex appeal, was the last thing I needed right now. I was standing on the outskirts and staring down a political shit storm that threatened my job—a job I had to beg for while beating out several other qualified applicants with better last names and a more powerful family than I had—and delivery boy over here was not helping.

  “No thanks,” I said quickly before I could change my mind. Because a sub and casual conversation with a hot guy sounded better than anything I had going on later. I wasn’t even going to count how long it had been since I rounded second with a man, let alone more . . .

  My gaze briefly shot to his mouth again. He stood to his full height, which was a couple inches over six feet, and adjusted his ball cap.

  “You just broke my heart, Red.” He put a palm over his chest and before he left, turned to say, “But I’m not giving up on you.”

  I gave an exasperated look and waved him off. Problem was, the view of his ass as he left was amazing to look at and depressing to watch walk away. All I could think about was what he’d look like naked. I was hard up, tired of feeling lacking in a ritzy environment of power and money, and the one job I earned was on the brink of slipping through my hands. I had a feeling today was going to get a hell of a lot harder real quick.

  It was almost six o’clock when Governor Reese finally came back.

  “Paige, can you come into my office please?” he said in a rough tone.

  I hustled and followed him in, shutting the door behind me.

  He sat behind his desk, smacked a manila envelope down, and ran his thumb and fingers along his brow as if trying to rub away a headache.

  “Bill is resigning,” he said with no sweet coating to his words.

  I stood in front of his desk, hands folded in front of me, staring in shock. I knew this was coming, but now that the rea
lity of it hit, it was like taking on an extra fifty pounds of stress and fear. Now was the part I’d been dreading.

  “I can help weather this storm, Governor,” I said. Ever since Roman started seeing my best friend, Amy, things were a little more relaxed between us. He was a good man, but he was still the governor of New York and our relationship was professional.

  He looked up at me and something in his eyes made my stomach drop to the floor. “I don’t think you can, Paige. Several interns have come forward claiming to have had a sexual relationship with Bill.”

  “Several?” I repeated. I’d heard there might be more than one, but it was still surreal to hear confirmation. I knew a lot of the interns. I also knew that most of them would do just about anything to climb the career ladder. All I could think about was Bill’s poor wife when she found out.

  “I can help,” I said again. It took everything I had to put myself through college and get this job.

  I left home the second I graduated high school. But age fifteen, after stepdad number three snuck into my room and mom didn’t believe me, was the turning point in my adolescence. Word got around town that I was the “girl who cried rape,” which led to an unflattering reputation. The kind that only attracted the wrong types of men. I spent the next couple years avoiding my house. But I was always viewed as trash. I knew it deep down. The guys who offered me an escape made it very clear I was beneath them since the entire town looked down on me already for accusing a respected man like Frank of attempted rape. I left and hadn’t looked back since.

  Attracting assholes was a skill that followed me through college until my first internship event when I made the mistake of bringing the guy I was dating, and the night ended in him punching a city council member he claimed I was flirting with. That was when I swore off that kind of man. The bad boys with an easy smile and even easier view on life.

  But after all the shit, the worst part was that my mother didn’t believe me, and she was still married to Frank. All that didn’t matter anymore though, because I was better now. I wasn’t that worthless, powerless girl with nothing. I strived every day for more. And that more was my job. There was very little in my life outside of it.